License Nuisance
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This story took place a long time ago when I was dating my wife.
One Friday afternoon I was talking to my girlfriend on the phone. She mentioned that her mother had been freaking out all week because her driver’s license was going to expire soon and she was unsure about being able to pass the written and driving test again. Things were quiet for the moment, however, because mom was out taking her test. Just a moment or two later her mom came home happy and because she passed the written test and did not have to take the driving portion at all. My girlfriend asked how it went. It turns out that a very nice man working at the DMV, realized how scared and nervous she was had taken her under his wing. He calmed her down, gave her the written exam, personally graded it, and reissued her a new license.
My roommate walked in the door to our apartment and I got an idea. I told my him that I needed his help to play a practical joke on my girlfriend’s mom. He was happy to join in. This would be a phone prank. We worked out a script with several different scenarios depending on how the mom reacted.
He dialed her number, mom answered the phone and he identified himself as the officer who had helped her at the DMV. He said he was very sorry to have to call but that there was a mix up and he was going to have to administer the driving portion of the test after all. Mom transformed from a woman without a worry in the world to one that felt her life was about to end. How this could happen? Officer roommate explained that in his concern over making her visit as painless as possible he inadvertently missed the driving requirement. It had been a simple mistake but there would be big trouble if the matter wasn’t straightened out as soon as possible.
After giving a thousand reason why she was unable to return to the DMV that day, (all of which we knew were totally bogus) finally consented and told the officer that she would drive down immediately to take the test. At this point he told her that she was currently in possession of an invalid driver’s license and that it would be illegal for her to operate a motor vehicle in the state of Illinois. She would need a family member or friend to drive her to the DMV. She again went off and started crying that she had nobody that could take her (remember my girlfriend is at the house, with 2 cars she could use). The officer (roommate) simply ended the conversation with an assurance that she could find someone to bring her.
We waited about 5 minutes to let things get really exciting before I called back. This was in the days prior to cell phones so I needed to call back before they left. My girlfriend answered and told me that she couldn’t talk now, that she was walking out of the house with her mom to take her back to the DMV. She said she would explain later but right now she had to help her mom fix this situation with her license before she had a stroke or completely falls apart. I could hear her mom in the background telling my girlfriend they have to leave right now.
I couldn’t torture mom anymore so I spilled the beans. My girlfriend told her mom that it was just a practical joke and she did not have to go down and take the driving test. Her mom insisted on talking
to me to confirm it wasn’t real. She was such an emotional wreck by this time she couldn’t decide if she was happy or mad… but she was definitely relieved… and possibly vengeful.
It’s been about 32 years since I pulled this joke on her and we all still get a
chuckle from time to time when it comes up. - Mike
April 30th, 2008 at 6:07 pm
That was Great! I didn’t know you ever had to take a test to renew your license. I think my Mom would just give up and not drive, she hates it already.
May 7th, 2008 at 10:55 pm
My friend in High School got a used car from a friend. It had no license plates, and the car did not run. So, his Dad fixed the car, paid all the back DMV fees, and they were issued new plates.
The lady at the DMV handed over the plates to them and they left.
When they got home. My friend called me to come over and go for a cruise. My friend was so excited to finally get to drive his old car.
His Dad opened the envelope to the new plates to put them on the car. We were sitting in the car with it running, waiting for his Dad to finish so we could go.
His Dad just started laughing like crazy putting the front plate on! We got out to see what the heck was going on…
The plate said “784 GAY”! I also busted up laughing! I was in no way going to ride in this car with THAT plate on it!
We went down to DMV and explained that we as high school kids could NOT drive around in a car with this plate! She laugh, and charged him like $18.00 to change the plates!
Joey